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Maryann (Mimi) McQueen - Online Memorial Website

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Maryann (Mimi) McQueen
Born in Massachusetts
46 years
19350
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Memories
tiffany
heyy aunttie i was just thinking of the nite wen u n everybody was cummin backk from bingoo and u fell lmfaooo it wassss sooooooooo funny u was to busy worried about the money u or momo wonnn and ur leg was all bleeding and u told me get u a facecloth n i was just sitting thea pissing myself laughing ahaha it was hilariosu i love u auntie n miss u more then i ever thought i could miss anything or anyone in my whole lyfe ;) ps- i wish u was hea to cum to bingo wytt me soo i can sitt thea and poke n punch u lyke i do momo wen im waiting i love you auntie oh and please stoppp following faith cuz thats all she ever talks about is that u walk her to the bathroom and play wyt her all dayyy love u ;) ( ieriewiiwqp3iuhyfgiurehgyudsjfydiuthjiudyeoipog tiot5x sdkusjmgesyui4bjv3erwy6uyer )   that was from faith lol love n miss u soooooo muchhhhh xoxoxoxoxo
Jessica Lynn

I wrote this a couple of months after mimi died and to this day I always think im going to see her face walk through my front door or when i answer the phone and hear her voice. I know that’s not going to happen but it doesn’t hurt to wish and dream right? I know your watching down on me mimi and guiding me through these tuff times and I know your with me every second of the day. Theres not a day that goes by where I don’t wear you around my neck on my necklace, I don’t care how old it is Ill wear it until I see you again :). I love you auntie mimi and miss you every passing day. Until we meet again please watch down on me, your always in my heart. I love you and miss you so much <3


Was there ever a time in your life where you sat by your phone waiting for someone to call, and when the phone finally rings, the person who you wanted to be calling isn’t the one who’s on the other end? There are days that go by when all I want is for you to walk through the front door, or when the phone rings, I always hope it’s you on the other end, but knowing these things will never happen, kills me. I lost a person who meant the world to me. She was like my second mother, someone who I can always go to and just talk.  The day she left me had to be the hardest thing I ever have to go through. Saying goodbye to someone you don’t want let go, is the hardest thing in life, and as I look back to the last month she was alive, I realized the decisions I made, is something I will always regret.

 

I walked into the hospital that day with my mother, with gifts to fill her room. Just seeing her in the hospital bed sitting there made me wonder and it made me think of how great of a person I really had in my life. We sat there talking for a while (probably about everyone and everything or complaining about something.) Then Cinda came in and we talked about the old times, when we were all little, and all the crazy things that we all once did. We had nothing but smiles on our face and the room was full of laughter. But when you have fun, time flies and sooner or later it was time to go. Not even thinking about the consequences that might happen, I walked out of the room without even a goodbye. I couldn’t even give her a kiss or simply say I love you. I walked out of the hospital not know that tomorrow’s never promised.

 

“Say what you need to say and do what you need to do because although tomorrow is going to come, it’s not promised for some!” The next day brought a shock that no one saw coming. That morning we got a call from my uncle stevie saying that Mimi was bleeding internally and was put to sleep. I couldn’t believe it, nobody could. Just yesterday she was fine. It was a shock to us all, how could this be happening when just the day before she was perfectly fine, talking about leaving the hospital soon because she was feeling better. After learning that some people don’t wake up when they are put to sleep, I never really worried about her. I knew deep down how strong of a person she really was, and I had so much faith in her that soon and hopefully soon, she’d be up and ready to leave the hospital for good. Days went by and everyday people went to go visit her, wishing and hoping that she’ll wake up. I prayed every night for her, hoping she’ll come out strong like she always does. There was not a day that went by where I didn’t think about her, I just wanted her to come back home!!

 

Two weeks went by, I went to visit her just about everyday that I could have. Walking into her room, seeing her laying on the bed strapped to iv’s and pumps, made my eyes do nothing but water. As I watched her, there was nothing else I wanted but for her to just open her eyes. I wanted so bad to help her, but knowing there was nothing I could do, made me melt inside. I couldn’t do it any more! I couldn’t deal with seeing her in the hospital bed for this long. It was enough for me. All I wanted was her back! I just wish things would go back to normal!

 

March 17 and March 18, were days that changed my life. After 2 weeks being asleep there was nothing the doctor could have done to help her, the only suggestion they had was to give her one more day. I wish I never heard those words “ONE MORE DAY” what could that do? All I wanted was for her to just wake up and for everything to go back to normal. It was like I was living in a dream and all of a sudden it turned into a nightmare. That day I heard the news, I couldn’t help but cry, I never cried so much in my life, and I was losing someone who meant the world to me.

 

Wednesday night, March 17, was the last day to say our good byes. The waiting room was full, there was people sitting on the floor, and people in the hallways, neither one of us wanted her to go. For the next couple of hours, we all went in to visit her by twos. The whole time I was shaking. I couldn’t get her off my mind. I thought I was just dreaming, I didn’t want to actually believe this was all really happening. Finally it was my turn to go in. I went in the room with Kara, her two god daughters. “I was her favorite godchild!!” I always said that to Kara (because I knew it was true =]) As we walked into her room my legs would not stop shaking. I didn’t know what to say or what to do. The room was filled with all kinds of gifts and flowers. We stood at the bottom of her bed just looking at her. I watched as I heard the pump make noises which was helping her breathe. At that point the tears couldn’t help but roll down my face. After about 5 minutes, Kara finally said it time to go. I didn’t want to walk out of that room. All that went through my mind at that point was when I left before without saying goodbye. I wanted to do nothing but just say by her side. But I knew there were other people waiting to come into the room to see her also. I stood beside her and gave her a kiss goodbye, as tears rolled down my check. I just wish this all wasn’t true!

 

After a couple of hours a priest came in to say a couple of prayers. We all gathered in her room. I sat down at the end of her bed in a daze. Everyone around me was crying, I didn’t think I could possibly shed any more tears. The priest said some prayers and left the room. At last, this really was the last time I would ever see her alive and breathing. I didn’t want to say goodbye, It was too soon. After a bunch of people gave her there last kiss goodbye I realized it was finally my turn. I had to do it. I leaned over and gave her a kiss on the forehead, not wanting to let go, I wanted to just stay there but I knew I couldn’t.  It had to be the hardest thing ever.

 

March 18, 2004.  I couldn’t go to the hospital that day, seeing her take her last couple of breaths I something I didn’t want to see. My mother and big stevie and a couple of other people went over there. I was lying on my couch at around 4p.m when I heard the phone ring. I didn’t want to hear anyone at this point, I just wanted to go to sleep. I didn’t know how to deal with something this bad. After I heard the phone hang up, I heard footsteps coming into the parlor. It was Kay-Kay “Jessica they pulled the plug, she only lasted 5 minutes. She’s in a better place now, everything will be ok.” Tears non stop rolled down my face as I faced the wall. My shirt was soaked. I knew it was for the good though. She was only suffering here; god took her in his own hands and realized that this decision was for the best.

 

That weekend I didn’t want to do anything. It still never really hit me that she was actually gone. That ill never see her ever again. I tried so hard not to even think about it. But everything that was going on some how reminded me of her. I didn’t even think I was going to make it past that weekend. The funeral and wake where next. I went through enough that past week; I just wanted it all to go away.

 

Monday and Tuesday were the dates for her funeral and wake. The night of the wake I didn’t know what to do. I never been to a wake, and I really didn’t want to go and see everyone crying. Everyone in my family was at the wake. When I walked in I didn’t even want to look at the casket, I just went to go sit down with every one else. I couldn’t deal with seeing someone who I loved with all my heart lay in a bed not moving or breathing, I just couldn’t do it. The whole night I tried to keep things off my mind. Me and derrick and a couple of my other cousins went down to the basement and just talked. Time few when we were downstairs and soon I noticed it was getting to be 8:00 p.m. We all went back up stairs, and we watched as others went up to the casket to say a prayer. 

 

One again I found my self in a position where I just wanted to freeze time. I didn’t want to move, I just wanted to stay in that moment forever because I didn’t think I can get through this. Me and my dad walked up to the casket. I didn’t want to even look at her. As I looked in the casket the only two things I saw was my red gap sweatshirt and a person who I loved more then life itself. I started to cry, I couldn’t even think straight, and still in my mind I wished it was all just a dream. I didn’t want to move away from the casket, this was the last time I was ever going to see her again. The tears non stop continued to roll down my face, as my dad whispered its time to go. I tried to ignore him because I didn’t want to move away. There were other people waiting. I finally stood up and lean over to give her a kiss. That night was terrible, I practically cried myself to sleep, and I still had the funeral to go to.

 

The next morning I laid in bed and just wanted to pick up the phone and call her house. I wanted to hear her on the other line for one last time. As we drove to the cemetery I stared out the window, wanting to just turn back around and go back to the hospital. “She’s fine, tomorrow she’ll be home and everything would be back to normal” I told my self that over and over trying to ease the pain I felt. As we got to the cemetery the casket was full of flowers. I didn’t hear one word the priest was saying, I just looked around as tears fell from my eyes.  Then I heard music “I’ve seen fire and I see rain, I’ve seen sunny days that I thought would never end, I’ve seen lonely times when I could not find a friend, but I always thought that I’d see you again.” This time had to be the hardest time I ever had to go through in life. And still in my mind I couldn’t believe she was actually gone.

 

         

kaykay goyette
mimi there is so much i can write! i still can't believe your not here with me! you were like a mom to me~ you always helped me & made me smile even though i did'nt want to-lol. so many memories & it's so hard not being able to hug & kiss you or say i love you. i wish you were with me cuz i need you to make me smile again!!! i will always & forever love you mimi~ love your lil' sister kaykay!
tiffany oconnor
dear my suck a duckk ill never forget every friday i stayed over your house and we'd watch nick at nite the golden gurls and ud always say blance was a slut lmfao i miss my weekends at ur house ill never forget every saturday morning ud wake the boys up to go get u a coffee n theyd all fite over who was going and wen i was staying wyt u for the weekend wen momo n scott went up maine and stacey was staying at my moms in harbor point n we went thea drunk on that friday that momo and scott left cuz u was at my moms playing pokeno and me and stacey was soo drunk and you was lyke u lil twat now ur not cumming to my house and u made stephen and carla cum get me and stay at stephens house ill never forget that u was soo mad at me for being shyt faced at lyke 12 years old lol and wen u told derrick u quit smoking and he was next door and u lit a cigarette and i ran over n was lyke derrick ur moms smoking n u couldnt hide it cuz we he came in u was at ur kitchen table sleeping and it was chilling on the table making another burn mark lmfao...... ill never forget wen i stayed over ur house on a weeknite and u fought wyt the bus driver to let me take the bus to the condon wyt derrick but on the way to the bus stop i ran into the tennis court and tripped n fell n u was laughing sooo hard at me... my veryy last memory of u was the nite before they put u to sleep i was in ur hospital room and i bought u the butterfly lolipops n u loved them n then wen i was leaving i kissed n hugged u n sed that i loved u id be back tomorrow and as i walked down the hallway u called me n i looked at u n u was lyke suck a duck look at my boobies u was nutts u left me to soon i love n miss u sooo muchh every year on my bdayy i member how u would call momos at 6am n leave ya bdayy song on the answering machine i wish u wea hea to meet my kids they would love you i kno ur still wyt me cuz every now and then faith be telling me ur in the bathroom wyt her... omg member u used to have me flush ur ashtray down the toilet n i would never give it back unless i washed it out and i used to hate taking showers at ur house cuz u never had condisinor i hated just using shampoo and i love how u always had my baby pic on ur dresser and only my pic thats how i knew i was ur fav neice ever and everytyme i went there wyt sumbody no matter who it was i always brang them in ur room to show them that pic aunite i  misss you more then ive ever missed anybody in my whole lyfe well be together soon and wen we get together agen we can start a whole new chapter of memories i love n miss u sooo much suck a duckkk ;( love always ur fav niece tiffany xoxo im sryy i can spill our secert that i was ur fav hahah love you
Total Memories: 4
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